Hey, don't laugh — I've seen moose droppings. They're quite prodigious. But anyway, I mean Moose droppings, as in that's what the Amerks turned the Manitoba Moose into tonight. Rochester reeled off four unanswered goals in the third period to pull away with a 6-3 win. The Amerks outshot Manitoba by a whopping 37-20, too. What was especially neat was that six different Amerks scored. Greg Jacina scored his third goal in two games and added an assist, and Clarke MacArthur notched two assists to go with his first goal of the season. Daniel Paille also had a goal and an assist. Now, the D&C's Kevin Oklobzija didn't think the Amerks played that well. He said the Amerks' freakish goal production — 12 in two games — won't last, and he saw several miscues that costed Rochester early. From where I was sitting, the Amerks thoroughly outplayed the Moose, but remember that Kevin has been covering the Americans for 22 years (I think) — he's much more knowledgable than me (and no, I don't mean that sarcastically. You always assume I'm being sarcastic. That's very hurtful. See, THAT was sarcastic). For their part the Amerks thought they played pretty well, noting that they came back twice from one-goal deficits. "We faced some adversity tonight, and we bounced back really well," MacArthur said. "All the credit goes to the guys on the team." MacArthur also stressed that although the Amerks have played only two games, they've displayed a consistency that was frequently absent during last season's train wreck. "We have to keep an even keel," he said. "We can't get too high or too low." Rochester coach Randy Cunneyworth said the team came out a little sluggishly, but by the third period things were clicking. He said the players showed "a conscious awareness" of each other on the ice, and he praised the team's discipline over the first two games. One possible concern was the play of goalie Craig Anderson, who let in three of 20 shots, a steep drop-off from the shutout he posted on Friday. Hopefully he'll be able to show some of that needed consistency. OK, now I have to address perhaps the biggest problem I've seen so far: the dearth of Diet Pepsi in the pressbox. There were maybe only a half-dozen in the fridge tonight, and they were warm. I need low-calorie caffeine like Mark Foley needs teenage boys. If I don't have it, I'm not responsible for my actions. I also realized how woefully underdressed I always am in the Amerks pressbox, which further adled my carbonation-deprived mind. Tonight most of the guys (and they were ALL guys, expect for one D&C photog) had sport coats, and a good portion of them were wearing ties. I, on the other hand, was wearing a polo shirt with jeans, and on Friday I wore a sweatshirt with jeans. In the past my relatively slobbish attire never really bothered me — I actually took a little pride in it — but for some reason it did bother me tonight. I wanted to hide under the table, or, better yet, baracade myself in the bathroom because I was so embarassed. (And I'm practiced at baracading myself into places. Like, for example, whenever there's a woman in the room.) I felt even worse when all the Rochester players put on suits for a post-game autograph session. These guys just played 60 minutes of hockey, and even THEY were better dressed than me. So I resolved to dress a little better from now on, but here's the problem: I have precisely ONE sport coat and ONE pair of dress pants. My tie collection numbers maybe a half-dozen outdated specimens, and two of those are South Park and Simpsons ties. My mother and step-mother always buy me nice clothes for Christmas, but for some reason those clothes always disappear into a black hole in my closet. So I'll have to buy myself some new clothes, which, unfortunately, means going shopping, and when I go shopping without diet soda, God help the poor sales clerk who rings up my mismatched Dockers and shirt. God help us all.

 

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