Even though the title is "Sports & Leisure," there’s no question that our coverage is slanted heavily in favor of the former. Every once in awhile, however, it’s good to put on the Leisure suit and move away from the Sports pages for a few minutes.
To help transition over to the "Living" section (or "Lifestyles" or equally sappy phrase), I’ve made an effort to watch as much television as possible this fall season. While I haven’t seen an episode of every new show, I’m sure I’ve got them all on tape somewhere. (And, by the way, when you argue against TiVo because "it only stores 30 hours," it’s a good sign that you might be watching too much TV.) Before I put on my critic hat, I should warn you that I’m not good with names. I generally identify actors as "the guy from..." For instance, when Friends premiered, the cast included "the guy who dated the ex-wife (the girl from the Guiding Light) on season one of NYPD Blue, and the waitress from Mad About You, and Alex P. Keaton’s girlfriend.
So without any further ado, here’s Leisure (& Sports) fall TV review.
Jericho: The Day After, the series. Nuclear war destroys most major US cities, and residents of a small town in Kansas struggle to survive. The first few episodes were brutally written, ham-handed attempts at creating Lost-like mysteries (a character returning to town gave everyone a different answer to the question, "Where have you been for five years?" Because if there’s one thing true about all small towns, it’s that no one would talk and compare notes) The show hit a low point when a possible radiation poisoning victim was told to drink iodine. The fact that viewer nationwide asked, "Isn’t that poisonous?" took away from the dramatic reveal that he wasn’t vomiting because he was exposed to radiation, but because...iodine is poisonous. Recent episodes have picked up the pace as we learn more about the scope of the attack, plus Major Dad slugged some guy in the gut last week. Bonus points for casting Arnold’s partner on Kindergarten Cop as Major Dad’s wife (and the mother of the skinny, scruffy dark-haired hero). Judith from Joan of Arcadia also plays a love interest.
The verdict: They’ve got me for now, but if they keep feeling the need to explain things like "radiation causes radiation sickness" they’ll lose me.
Heroes: Now this show? Is brutal. Rarely have confusing and dull been combined so efficiently in one package. Regular folks suddenly find out they have super powers, but not cool ones. The lab tech from Scrubs can bend time and space while making poor Star Trek jokes. The skinny, scruffy dark-haired hero thinks he can fly, but he’s not sure. So rather than testing it out on, say, the couch, he leaps off of a building. A cheerleader can’t be killed. A single-mom porn star has the stereotypical heart of gold as well as the less common killer alter ego that lives in a mirror. They keep showing an Indian cab driver, so he must have powers too. You’re telling me Vaughn’s partner Weiss couldn’t get a better post-Alias gig than this?
The verdict: See it before it’s gone. Hopefully you’re too late.
Justice: Speaking of post-Alias gigs...Jack Bristow is a sleazy defense lawyer who lives in a bizarre parallel universe where Court TV actually covers trials instead of running NYPD Blue repeats. Mohammad Said shows that he didn’t lose his remarkable overacting skills after leaving his cell in Oz. The show assumes you’ve never seen The Practice, LA Law, or any other law show, and thus the lawyers spent too much time explaining things they should already know to each other. ("If we can get the jury to consider that there might be another suspect, we can create reasonable doubt.") Plus, thus far, the gimmick ending, where we get to see what really happened, has kind of fizzled, since the defense lawyers have been on the side of truth in every case. In keeping with the new FCC requirements, there is a skinny, scruffy dark-haired hero on this show as well.
The verdict: Jack, Said, and guest stars like Jimmy Berlutti will keep it must see for awhile.
Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip: Aaron Sorkin returns to television! What a cast! Josh Lyman from the West Wing! Chandler! One of the guys from Wings! (The one I like!) Even the supporting cast is star-studded, including the guy from The Hughleys, Miss Isringhausen from Deadwood, and the reporter with the crush on C.J. from the West Wing. And yet...not so much with the interest level. You’d think a show based on backstage Saturday Night Live might show some wild wrap parties, hung-over cast members acting like divas, attempts to cover for a guest host with no comedic skill. You’d think the show would be packed with lines that don’t make sense and must be juicy inside jokes for SNL alums. You’d be wrong on both counts.
The verdict: I’ll watch out of West Wing loyalty. It’s a little better than a spin-off would have been.
Six Degrees: So…this isn’t Heroes? There are two separate shows? No wonder nothing made sense. This is the one that follows a bunch of random people we don’t care about, and they DON’T have super powers. The scruffy dark-haired hero (who, in a bold casting move, is a little chunky) is a lawyer, trying to date a client, who seems to be a secret agent, working as a nanny for a woman, who knows a lady that hired a photographer and has a fiancé who is cheating on her, with… And you thought the plots for 24 were convoluted. The message is that we’re all connected. Message received. You don’t need an hour a week until May to deliver it.
The verdict: Seriously…it’s not Heroes?
Ugly Betty: Hee hee hee. I love this show. I know, I’m not exactly the correct demographic for it (not that I’d ever call something a “chick show”), but this is the best new show on television. Right up there with this summer’s Psych. Any show that has the OC’s Caleb Nichol *and* the evil Dean of Harbor School has to be good. Throw in a bad guy from 24 as the dad and a Vanessa Williams role that is right up there with Boston Legal’s Denny Crane and you have a winner.
The verdict: You have to watch this show
Runaway, Kidnapped, Standoff, Vanished: OK. Now someone is messing with me. These are NOT all different shows. I’m pretty sure it’s one, multi-night, multi-network series about mailing body parts to horrified parents. Right? Sometimes, it has Brenda’s crazy brother from Six Feet Under as the scruffy, skinny hero with dark hair. Sometimes it’s the dude from Office Space. And sometimes it’s that New Kids on the Block/Entourage guy. Jack Bauer’s wife is in there somewhere. One show gives us Walt Cummings (24), Dylan McKay’s wife (90210), Richie Valens’ brother—the one who took over the precinct after people stopped watching NYPD Blue, and the Asian doctor that ER could never get us to like. It’s nice to be able to not watch them all at the same time.
The verdict: Watch one of them. Once. You’ll see it all.
Friday Night Lights: Better than the movie, not as good as the book. Not as good as an actual game, that’s for sure. The first few episodes have been good, old fashioned tear-jerkers along the lines of Season One of The Contender. The dropoff could be extremely steep, however, once we get a few weeks in. Kind of like watching laceName w:st="on">FloridalaceName> laceType w:st="on">StatelaceType>.
The verdict: I’ll watch, but I’ll be looking for signs of decay.
The Nine: Why is this so hard for TV executives? We watch Lost because it’s well-written and the characters are intriguing. We watch Lost in spite of all the questions they refuse to answer (mainly because the writers haven’t figured it out yet). If you want us to watch new shows, write them well. Give us interesting characters. You’re copying the wrong thing. Still, this show is good enough to pull out of the “lots of confusing characters” abyss currently inhabited by Heroes and Six Degrees. It’s also good enough to avoid the 24-knockoff pile of Runaway, et al. The cast isn’t too promising: There’s the guy from Wings I don’t like, the lady they keep adding to shows and trying to get us to like (she was Gina on NYPD Blue and Carrie on 24), and the VP’s brother from Prison Break. There’s also one of Kiefer’s 24 love interests, and it’s not Nina, so she stunk. Points for giving us Principal Chi from Boston Public, but that’s about the only bright spot.
The verdict: It’s on after Lost, so remote-control inertia gives it legs.
The Class: It’s no My Name is Earl, but it’s the Cinderella sitcom of the season. Four episodes in, and it still makes me laugh. It took me two weeks to recognize Joan Girardi’s brother without his wheelchair.
The verdict: The clock is ticking closer to midnight.
